Frustrations

Today has been frustrating. Okay, correction...since it is only 11:30am, this morning has been frustrating. My day started out normal. Got up late and didn't have much time to make myself presentable. This just means wet hair and doing makeup in the car. I got to school right on time only to be faced with a faculty meeting that ran over time. Still, I was fine with all of that. I wasn't really having a great attitude today about having to come in to work, but as soon as I stepped in my classroom, I changed it. I decided to be cheery and upbeat and helpful and loving to my students.
The morning started off with some phonics work, in which the kids did fine. Then, we moved on to numbers, doing our 8 family addition and learning how to tell time at the :15 mark...such as 12:15, 1:15, 2:15, etc. The kids did great with that too. My classroom aide was in today, so I decided to do reading groups. I pulled out the 3 papers the kids were to work on independently as seatwork. I explained every page thoroughly. As soon as every child had a paper and his or her pouch containing pencils, erasers, crayons, colored pencils, etc, I got down the reading books and prepared the back table for groups. The frustrating part about today was that we never made it to reading groups. No, that wasn't even the worst part. The worst part was just about every single child forgot everything we have learned...all....year....long. They were claiming to not know how to tell time and to not know how to write in cursive. (We have been writing in cursive from the beginning of the year.) They were not understanding anything we were trying to do. My aide and I were going all around the room helping waaaay more than should be necessary in the last quarter of Kindergarten. It was absolutely ridiculous.
I don't usually get down too much on myself for "failures" that may occur in my life. Losing a sports game, not doing well on a test, failing to play the piano well at an event are all things that I feel are failures. But, for some reason, today, when I got the feeling of failure at teaching, I was/am crushed. Teaching has become so very important to me and I love it. A lot. The feeling of failing at something like this is overwhelming for me.
I realize, kids have bad days. And I realize that teachers have bad days. But, this was like every single one of my students. And it was all morning long. If it weren't for having to come back out, I would have broken down in the closet when I went in to get snack for snacktime. Even now, I feel like crying. But, now is not the time. I hate this feeling.
Before my aide left she said, "Well, maybe tomorrow will be better." I wholeheartedly agreed with her and decided that there is NO way that tomorrow can't be better...Praise the LORD for new mornings and for His mercies that are new.

Lamentations 3:21-24
This I recall to my mind, Therefore I have hope. The LORD'S lovingkindnesses indeed never cease, For His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness. "The LORD is my portion," says my soul, "Therefore I have hope in Him."